Wealth Tip 24: Re-evaluate the Meanings you gave to the Pivotal Money Experiences of Your Childhood
I’ve already talked about your Wealth Operating System™ in earlier Wealth Tips. I’d like to share a highly personal story of how I’ve come to re-evaluate one of my early money moments.
For me one of the most painful memories of money that I had was of a time when I was a pre-teen. My parents were just in the starting phase of a painful divorce that was quite messy and emotionally painful. I was sitting in the kitchen when my mom came up to me and asked me if I knew whether or not my dad had sent the alimony and child support check yet that month because it was late. She was clearly very distraught and I remember how so uncomfortable I felt at that moment, like I wanted to disappear. The “lesson” I learned was that money was something you shouldn’t talk about. It wasn’t a safe topic. It was dangerous.
As you can imagine, this lesson influenced my life in many ways. I avoided the topic of money wherever I could, and pushed away from money. To me it was bad and dangerous. I know too many people this might seem crazy to make one experience mean this much, but remember, I was a twelve year old kid who didn’t have the capacity at that moment to see that my mom was really in pain and needing to garner me as an emotional ally. I am not making any judgment over that moment, only that as a young kid I made it mean something that had long term impact on my life.
It took some real soul searching to realize that I made that moment mean something that disempowered me. In truth, I brought the limiting meaning to the experience by the story I made up about the experience. We’ve all done the same thing in this and other areas of our lives.
Maui Millionaires™ consciously craft the meanings and stories of their lives to empower themselves. You have that same opportunity in your own life.
For more on your Wealth Operating System™ including a 5 step system for upgrading it see, The Maui Millionaires pp. 19-78.
For me one of the most painful memories of money that I had was of a time when I was a pre-teen. My parents were just in the starting phase of a painful divorce that was quite messy and emotionally painful. I was sitting in the kitchen when my mom came up to me and asked me if I knew whether or not my dad had sent the alimony and child support check yet that month because it was late. She was clearly very distraught and I remember how so uncomfortable I felt at that moment, like I wanted to disappear. The “lesson” I learned was that money was something you shouldn’t talk about. It wasn’t a safe topic. It was dangerous.
As you can imagine, this lesson influenced my life in many ways. I avoided the topic of money wherever I could, and pushed away from money. To me it was bad and dangerous. I know too many people this might seem crazy to make one experience mean this much, but remember, I was a twelve year old kid who didn’t have the capacity at that moment to see that my mom was really in pain and needing to garner me as an emotional ally. I am not making any judgment over that moment, only that as a young kid I made it mean something that had long term impact on my life.
It took some real soul searching to realize that I made that moment mean something that disempowered me. In truth, I brought the limiting meaning to the experience by the story I made up about the experience. We’ve all done the same thing in this and other areas of our lives.
Maui Millionaires™ consciously craft the meanings and stories of their lives to empower themselves. You have that same opportunity in your own life.
For more on your Wealth Operating System™ including a 5 step system for upgrading it see, The Maui Millionaires pp. 19-78.
posted by David Finkel at 12:12 PM
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